Ok… not so much “quit the job” as in “work found out.”
My chain of command is extensive and contains a lot of guys named Dan. One day (before I announced it on my blog, obviously), my immediate Dan came over to my cube and casually, typically, unceremoniously flopped himself down in the extra chair, tilted his head to the side and squinted. “So, uh, I just heard a crazy rumor that you’re quitting your job next year to travel the world?”
This was unexpected, to say the least. Shiiiiiit. I was completely speechless. The only reaction my body was capable of was to send all red blood cells to my face for immediate blushing and activate all every single sweat gland simultaneously. (Literally. I’m not kidding. That all happened in well under two seconds. Deluge.)
My mind started calculating how much money I planned on saving in the next couple of months before my trip and would the trip still be possible if they terminated me on the spot. Wheels turning, wheels turning… “Ummm, do I have to answer that?”
I honestly think he was expecting my answer to be a flat “no,” and I only say this because of the way his eyebrows immediately flew straight off his forehead. “I think ya just did,” he said incredulously.
He knows me pretty well, so he quickly understood that this is happening. I stumbled and mumbled trying to figure out what to say next but my brain was still doing math and math is harrrrd. I think Dan had pity on my gaping mouth and sudden lack of composure and put his hand up to silence me.
Long story short – he was happy for me. He’s generally the kind of guy that supports people following their bliss. (Although, of note, he hails from Wyoming, once dangled over Yellowstone Falls by his ankles, eats copious amounts of all varietals of jerky, is a self-described “metal head” and generally a pretty hard-core man’s man, so he’d never actually utter the phrase “follow your bliss.”) Words caught up to me with a vengeance. “Dan! As my friend, I have been dying to tell you but as my boss I didn’t want to put you in an awkward position and please don’t fire me before February because I really really really need all the money until then!” He laughed then I laughed and clasped my hands over my mouth (mostly because they were cool and felt soothing on my still blushing face). He stood up to hug me and I more so hung on for dear life than hugged him back.
Whoa, jeez. So this is happening.
He told the next Dan in line and I was summoned almost immediately. “Please don’t fire me, please don’t fire me, please don’t fire me,” I thought as I walked into his office. All I wanted was to stay until February, so you can imagine how happy and relieved I was when he asked me to consider my future with the company beyond that. I can definitely say that I’m leaving on good terms. Not fired by any means! Win! However, that being said, I am choosing not to put a bookend on my trip and return at a specifically designated time.
Maybe this will be a once in a lifetime trip and maybe it won’t be. I’m going to err on the side of caution and assume that it is. Live everyday like it’s a once in a lifetime day… because it is, essentially.
In the intervening time, everybody else has heard the news and has had a myriad of reactions – most of which I have enjoyed and found really amusing. (I’m giving the benefit of the doubt that “You’re not going by yourself, are you?” is well-intended. However, this never ceases to piss off my inner feminist.) The secondary and tertiary Dans said they wished I’d stay (intensely flattering) but understand my going, are really happy for me, and support me in livin’ the dream.
With a grateful heart, I add this crew to the long list of incredibly supportive people in my life. I take every single well wish to heart and they buoy me along. This is a wonderful group of people and I don’t take my departure from them lightly. I know how rare it is to work in an environment that is such a well-oiled machine and with so little drama. It’s very special.
These coworkers and friends… we know each other’s doughnut preferences, drink preferences, how hot they like their salsa and the subsequent digestive issues, pet peeves, love lives or lack thereof. Countless stories about girlfriends, boyfriends, wives, husbands, children, grandchildren. There have been birthday parties, graduation parties, Christmas parties, ice cream Fridays, friends and family tours and that one time Angela met an astronaut, tech appreciation nights, book readings, retirement parties, and memorial services. The inside jokes, the bad jokes, the dirty jokes, the good jokes that I will always try to remember.
I came to this job very organically as a recommendation from a close friend. After a few years of scraping by and crossing my fingers as a baker, I thought health insurance and a livable wage seemed like a good idea, so I seized the opportunity when it fell into my lap. I didn’t expect to lay tracks for a career path or make dozens of good friends and hundreds of great memories.
I will miss these people. I will carry them with me. And I will tell Steve’s Lone Ranger joke to new friends I have yet to meet.
Tarts & Travels 